does nothing bother you!?

At 6:00am on the dot, one of the specialists came in. Mind you, I hadn’t slept at all over the night so 6:00am wasn’t a good time for me to listen to important information. The doctor was an infectious disease specialist  and ordered some more tests for Kemmon. He was completely perplexed by all of the info he had gotten from all of the tests that were taken the night before. 

Side Note: So you might be thinking why would an infectious disease specialist come to see Kemmon? WELL, Kemmon had been acting so off before this I had started taking him to an infectious disease specialist. We had gone a couple of times and the doctor couldn’t figure out what was wrong. So I had to keep journals of Kemmon’s temperature and other BS so I could tell the doctor trends. While it’s a bit funny now, I was pissed when I found out I had been doing all these things when Kemmon knew it was all just a lie. 

The lung doctor came in soon after and said because Kemmon had so many marks on his lungs they wanted to cut out some tissue and do a lung wash. Also at 6:00am, Kemmon’s mom called and freaked out on me. She said she was driving to the hospital with Kemmon’s sister, K, and my father-in-law. 

At about 8:00am his mom rolls in. She started crying and started to ask me all kinds of questions. I didn’t have any answers for her. She was visibly upset with me. Truthfully, I didn’t give a shit. Her son had been such an asshole over the past few hours I wanted to say “Take him back! I don’t want him anymore”. Because of my lack of emotion over the whole situation, she then said, “Does nothing bother you?!”. OMG I could have flipped the fucking hospital bed. Who the fuck was she to say that to me. Does she have any idea of how much I have done for her son? I have been living in a HELL for the past few years (especially the past few hours) and because I’m not a sobbing mess means I don’t care. Go scratch… I’m over this. 

“because of my lack of emotion over the whole situation she then said, “does nothing bother you?!””

His family stayed with us all day. They were able to witness how mean he was to me in the brief moments he was awake, which wasn’t very often. I think at about 10:00pm they decided to head home and said they would be back the next day. 

On a completely separate note, I was gearing up for my busy season at work. I was in the midst of negotiating a HUGE contract at work which was probably one of the coolest things I have done in my career so far. It was for a private concert with an A-list country celebrity during the Final Four. I was negotiating the contract while sitting next to Kemmon in his hospital bed. 

The next day came around, and his family showed up bright and early in the morning. I mean I’m glad they were there, but I just wanted to be left alone. 

That night Kemmon decided it would be a good idea to leave the ICU floor and go smoke a cigarette. At 4:00am he was being escorted back into the room by a nurse who was telling him how dangerous it was that he left the room. Kemmon didn’t give shit. Long story short he was discharged two days after we arrived and we didn’t have any answers other than pneumonia. 

Funny Story: While this is funny now, Kemmon actually snuck out of the hospital and was hiding outside smoking. I guess there were tons of people looking for him. Unfortunately, that wasn’t our last time in the ICU. The next time we went, they put an alarm on his bed so he couldn’t escape. 

7 Years Later…

It’s really hard to go back and think about this time. I was close with my sister-in-law, and I vividly remember her asking if I got a divorce from Kemmon if we could still be friends and hang out. I told her no. My mother-in-law also tried to talk to me about going to marriage counseling. I let her know we had been going for quite some time. Something else I haven't mentioned yet is all of the times his mom and sister would call me asking “what’s wrong with Kemmon?”. I would always say he was tired or say I didn’t know what they were talking about. I wasn’t lying, I really had no clue what was going on right in front of my face. It’s so odd to think that this was only the start of some really messed-up times.

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