Best Night’s Sleep

After that trip to the ER, I said he needed to get into treatment, and he agreed. I spent the whole next day at work trying to get him into a rehab facility by our house. It was a two hour appointment. They recommended detox and inpatient care, but he refused. They told us that he couldn’t get treatment unless he was off of all of the drugs. They recommended a local addiction doctor to help him with his withdrawal/script with Suboxone. 

“ ...got a call from a restricted number. Kemmon was on the other line saying that he got in an accident with a semi-truck and he was being arrested.”

I made the appointment with the doctor the next day or so. Because I had taken off so much work with all of this other BS, I couldn’t go to the appointment. Keep in mind that at this point I still didn’t really think Kemmon had a problem. Dumb, huh? 

I had an event I was attending with some industry friends the night Kemmon had his appointment with the addiction doctor. Everything was going great. He texted me to say the appointment went well and he would see me at home after my event. A short time after that text I got a call from a restricted number. Kemmon was on the other line saying that he got in an accident with a semi-truck and he was being arrested. He said he wanted to get high “just one more time” and started to cry. 

I ran out of my event and was standing outside. The officer got on the phone and told me that they were taking him to the hospital to test his blood and that they had to go. I remember saying, “Okay, great I’ll meet you at the hospital,” but the officer said, “No, he’s going to jail tonight.” I called a girlfriend inside the event and asked her to bring out my purse and said I had to go. She asked if there was anything she could do. I said no and took off. 

Accident update: Everyone was okay, but he wrecked a car that we had borrowed from his 94-year-old great-grandmother because he had just been in another accident. 

This happened on June 11th, after he had just been in ICU for the second time on May 30th. Needless to say, I was just a mess. Well, maybe I wasn’t. I didn’t feel anything, so whatever life, bring it on. 

He called me ALL night long telling me how sorry he was and how much he hated it in there. I told him I couldn’t take off work the next day to deal with this BS so he would have to wait until after I got off work for me to bail him out, if they would let him out. 

The next day at work I kept logging into the jail website to see if I could tell how much money I needed for his bond. About noon, I saw the notes next to his charges said dismissed. What does that mean? Was he out doing drugs somewhere downtown? Why didn’t he call me? WHAT’S GOING ON!? A few minutes later he called. They had somehow released him from jail and he was just walking around downtown and he needed me to come get him. I told him to stay where he was and I would be right there. I saw him on the corner and he started sprinting towards me. I got out of the car and he gave me a hug. He was crying so hard, telling me how terrible it was. Since we only had one car, he had to come to work with me and just wait until I got off. I was so glad that mess was over.

7 years later…

When Kemmon was in jail, it was the best night’s sleep I had in a long time. There were so many times I’d wake up at night and he’d be gone. I’d wake up at 5am before work and he’d be gone. I’d run to the grocery store, and when I got back, he’d be gone. But not this night. I knew exactly where he was going to be and that brought me so much comfort. I felt bad for him the first time he called, but after that, he wouldn’t stop calling! I think at 2am I told him he had to stop calling me because I needed sleep. 

He had to tell his addiction doctor he needed a new prescription of suboxone because the jail kept all his strips when he got arrested. She was so nice and refilled his prescription. We had a follow-up meeting with her, and I was able to attend. I asked her a ton of questions and realized I had been with her for 2 hours. I asked her if she thought Kemmon had a serious drug problem, and she said he was one of the worst she’d seen in a while. I was shocked. 

This doctor has since moved away, but every year on Kemmon’s sober anniversary he emails her to tell her he got another year clean. I think that’s so sweet. One of the best things his addiction doctor told Kemmon to do was journal everything that had happened to him in jail. She said it was very important to note every detail, down to the color spots that were on his bologna sandwich. Kemmon did exactly what she said, and truthfully, he was so scared when he went to jail, I really think he knew he wanted to try and do anything he could to stay out of there. 

“I don’t think I’ll ever truly get over how much that hurt me during this whole ordeal. ”

Something I will never forget is calling one of Kemmon’s friends. We had just reconnected with him, and I told him Kemmon was in jail and asked what I should do. His friend was so sweet. He didn’t know what to say or do, but he asked if I wanted to take a ride in his jeep with all the doors and roof off. While I’m writing this it brings tears to my eyes. This guy who I had just met had no CLUE what to say or do but did offer me what he thought would take my mind off the situation. I giggled and thanked him for the offer but just wanted to go to bed. I remember calling Kemmon’s sister and told her a brief outline of what happened. I told her she had to tell her mom because I was NOT. 

Oh, I also had the lady at the jail hang up on me. This happened at like 6pm and I had no idea how the whole process worked. Because Kemmon had such severe sleep apnea I called the jail asking if I could bring his CPAP machine to the jail so he could use it that night. How fucking crazy am I?! ha ha I was trying to explain to her how bad his sleep apnea was and that he has trouble breathing and all that jazz. She hung up on me before I finished my story. 

One last thing I won’t forget. The morning after Kemmon went to jail I called one of Kemmon’s friends. I told them Kemmon had a problem with heroin and he was in jail. Kemmon and this person were/are close. We had hung out many times, and I had developed a bit of a friendship with this person too. I really thought they would kick into gear and help out, but I was mistaken. They pretty much faded away and did nothing to help or assist. We still have a relationship with this person and they are a really great person, but I don’t think I’ll ever truly get over how much that hurt me during this whole ordeal.

If this is the first time you’re reading anything about addiction, welcome. You’ve found a place where someone can relate to what you’re going through. Please check out Boy Problems Podcast to hear Jessica + Shannon and I tell our stories. And whatever you do, keep coming back.

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